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Why Marriages Fail
#1
Here's a great article by Dr. Helen Smith, wife of Glen Reynolds. Both are from Knoxville, and appear on PJ Media.

Quote:Observations on Relationships in a Grocery Store: It's no wonder so many men feel that it is better to flip through women on Tinder than to get into a long-term relationship.

I was traveling to the Midwest and stopped by a Target store to pick up supplies when it started pouring rain. There was a tornado watch that was not serious, but the rain was torrential. The shoppers all stood by the door and watched the downpour and some brave souls ran out to get their car to pick up their families who were inside. Some were moms who ran out to get the minivan to pick up their daughters. Others were men running out to get their girlfriends, wives or kids.

As I watched the scene, I noticed one couple in their twenties or early thirties with a young child. The mother held the child and looked sourly at the father who did not say much. He tried to put a blanket around the kid but she gave him a look that said he was incompetent (at least from what I could observe). She looked put out with him as he pulled his jacket hood over his head and ran out to get the car in the downpour, looking like a soaked rat, and then pulled up to retrieve her and the child, who got into the warm car and left. I thought about how men quietly go about their day helping in ways that are often not recognized, or worse, greeted with a sour expression and a sense of entitlement from the women in their lives (and sometimes from other men). “Is this the life of a man in a relationship?” I wondered.

I often think men’s contributions to families and society are overlooked these days or taken for granted. It’s no wonder so many men feel that it is better to flip through women on Tinder than to get into a long-term relationship. A smile from a woman you don’t know might be better at times than a smirk of irritation from the one you do.

I understand that men have faults and that women’s look of disgust might be warranted, but in a relationship of caring, research by John Gottman, author of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert, shows that facial expressions of disgust and anger are not good signs for a marriage.

Perhaps if the woman in Target had thanked her partner for going to get the car or trying to help with the kid, it would have been better for their relationship. A sneer doesn’t seem like a good idea. Over time, it can wreak havoc on a marriage. The society sneers at men, making it easier for women to do the same. It is no wonder so many men avoid marriage altogether. Being taken for granted is not a good feeling.
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"INSIDE EVERY PROGRESSIVE IS A TOTALITARIAN SCREAMING TO GET OUT" - David Horowitz

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#2
Women I have lived with rarely gave me favors when I did something hard or physicaly demanding or even being generous. Total waste. Divorced twice, twice screwed. Fortunately the second time it wasn't official, I'm stupid but not crazy.

And when I think of you John, I realize I wasn't the most unfortunate person down here: Taking away your collection of vintage vinyls must be realy inhumane...
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#3
(02-26-2016, 06:46 PM)Fredledingue Wrote: Women I have lived with rarely gave me favors when I did something hard or physicaly demanding or even being generous. Total waste. Divorced twice, twice screwed. Fortunately the second time it wasn't official, I'm stupid but not crazy.

And when I think of you John, I realize I wasn't the most unfortunate person down here: Taking away your collection of vintage vinyls must be realy inhumane...

I had already moved to Raleigh and was going back and forth to get my things. I only had room for about half my record collection, so I had to leave the other half behind, until the next time. Unfortunately, there wasn't a next time. She did what unstable women do, and threw a tantrum over nothing. She was having a yard sale, and sold all of them for $.50 an album.

I was heartbroken, but then the other half I stored in my parent's home in South Carolina. Well, they had one of those 200 year floods there, and the basement flooded, and screwed up the album covers. I just threw up my hands and gave up. Mom gave them to our cousin Kenneth, along with all of Dad's records, which were much bigger than mine.

So I don't even think about vinyl anymore. I just collect music mp3s of the highest quality. I have a lot of flac, and some ape, but will eventually convert all of them to 320mps and delete them. If anyone ever uncompressed a 320mps and converted it into lossless, they couldn't tell the difference anyway.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________
"INSIDE EVERY PROGRESSIVE IS A TOTALITARIAN SCREAMING TO GET OUT" - David Horowitz

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#4
Incidentally Fred, I take an SSRI for my clinical depression. Its Prozac and it has a reputation for curbing one's libido. Well, it has totally removed mine, and I am now asexual for all intents and purposes. And I really like it. I've only dated one woman since my divorce, and that was about three months. After that, no more. I'm through, and don't miss it at all.

I now like being asexual. That removes about 90% of my frustrations. S22
___________________________________________________________________________________________________
"INSIDE EVERY PROGRESSIVE IS A TOTALITARIAN SCREAMING TO GET OUT" - David Horowitz

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#5
When I went to see a lawyer with regard to divorcing from my first wife in 1989 he asked me if I wanted to do it the cheap way or the expensive way. I asked him what was the cheap way was and he replied give her what she wants and get on with your life. I opted for the cheap way. Most of the people I knew thought I was nuts. It took a little more than a month and only cost me about $2,300, and that included my former wife purchasing my share of the matrimonial home. My former wife had a 12 girl and 14-year-old boy from a previous marriage and wanted me to pay child support. The judge didn't allow it as she was already receiving supports payments from her previous husband. I didn't plan it this way, but I got my life back Valentine's Day 1989. I had to take back a 5-year mortgage @ 10% with no monthly payments in order for her to afford to buy me out. She continue to live beyond her means and approached me three years later asking that I postpone my mortgage so she could put on a new first mortgage to pay off her debts. I refused and she was forced to sell the house. The mortgage I took back proved to be a really good investment as all it did was accrue interest. Two years after my divorce my lawyer became a judge. The house in question can be found [url=When I went to see a lawyer in regard to divorcing from my first wife in 1989 he asked me if I wanted to do it the cheap way or the expensive way. I asked him what was the cheap way was and he replied give her what she wants and get on with your life. I opted for the cheap way. Most of the people I knew thought I was nuts. It took a little more than a month and only cost me about $2,300, and that included my former wife purchasing my share of the matrimonial home. My former wife had a 12 girl and 14-year-old boy from a previous marriage and wanted me to pay child support. The judge didn't allow it as she was already receiving supports payments from her previous husband. I didn't plan it this way, but I got my life back Valentine's Day 1989. I had to take back a 5-year mortgage @ 10% with no monthly payments in order for her to afford to buy me out. She continue to live beyond her means and approached me three years later asking that I postpone my mortgage so she could put on a new first mortgage to pay off her debts. I refused and she was forced to sell the house. The mortgage I took back proved to be a really good investment as all it did was accrue interest. Two years after my divorce my lawyer became a judge. free in a much smaller house.
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#6


"Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want and deserve to get it good and hard."
-- Henry Mencken
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